When it rains, it pours...

One of the biggest challenges I have been facing this week is going from two incomes to one. And really this has been an adjustment over the months, but this week has really been one of the more difficult times. It's true what "they" say "when it rains, it pours."

For my birthday, I bought myself two presents. First, I am going to be celebrating turning 28 by skydiving, more on that later. Second, I traded in the car that embodied my EH and bought myself a brand spanking new white Beetle. She pretty much looks like me and definitely seems to be ready to go on an adventure.

Unfortunately, I bought her before I found out I needed a root canal and other dental procedures done. I'm very lucky that my insurance covers a portion of the work, however, I still am running at about $1500 for everything to be completed.

Normally this would be a shared financial responsibility, but here I am by myself, having had two weeks off for a vacation and having just bought a car. I wouldn't take back either, but it does put a strain on my bank account and has caused a severe amount of stress.

On top of that my girlfriend is getting married this weekend in Boston, and there is no way I am going to miss that. But with that comes a plane ticket, a hotel, and because I am so incredibly clueless I booked a hotel too far away from the venue to use public transportation, which means I am now renting a car.

And let's not forget the daily expenses and bills that seem to always get in the way. Needless to say, I was hit with a reminder that I am all alone in this. I don't have my EH to help support me. And the comfort in knowing that someone else was there to pick up where I am unable to, is no longer there.

I am fortunate that my parents are willing to help me, and I have learned a great lesson in humility in having to go to them for financial aid. But at the end of the day, I want to feel that independence again from them, with the knowledge that my other half is there for me to depend on.

It seems contradictory to say that, but depending on my EH felt much more comfortable and natural than depending on my parents.

I'm pretty sure all of this is what led to me breaking down when trying to get my niece ready for ballet class. She didn't want to go and started crying...I started crying and told her I couldn't deal with life. She asked me if I needed the dogs to make me smile again. In the end she went to ballet and I definitely had a smile on my face.