I Worked On Me...

I'm always amazed when other women ask me how did you do it? How did you go through your divorce and come out as happy as you are? And then comes the inevitable question...
Did you date a lot?

And I'm usually amazed because the women who ask me are older and/or seem so put together that I feel my answer is maybe not as useful as what they could come up for themselves. I guess I don't feel so wise on the subject. Nevertheless they do ask...I suppose because when you are going through something like a divorce or breakup, you seek answers from anyone you can.

My answer is always simple: I worked on me.

Then comes the question how?

I worked on healing my mind, body and soul. I found my happiness and didn't worry about finding another relationship. I didn't date to try to find the one...I worked on me.

That did mean more alone time, which can be uncomfortable. It did include more family and friends time, which at times feels difficult, when all you want to do is crawl up in a ball and cry. And it meant challenging myself.

I did things for me. I worked on me so that when the right person did come along, they were getting someone who was healthy and happy.

Sometimes my answer is lost on the person asking...and I always let them know what I did isn't the answer for everyone, but it's the only one I know. And as a result I am, for the most part, happy. When it comes to the divorce, my heart has completely healed.

I'm at the point where if I ever saw EH I would thank him. Because my life, my relationship with Bear, is better than I could have ever imagined.

Yup, I worked on me. And having learned the benefit of doing so, I will continue to work on me for the rest of my life.